Category Archives: John and Staci Eldredge

Lessons Learned


Four and a half months in

I would like to tell some of the things I’ve learned over the course of the last few months. These are things I wish I had known about going in and have had to learn the hard way.

Expect Difficulties

In their latest book Love & War: Finding the Marriage You’ve Dreamed Of. John and Stasi Eldredge say how surprised they were at all the difficulties they faced in their marriage. We too were surprised that this is hard!

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Love and War – Eldredge

This is a great book. John and Staci Eldredge have written an incredible description of what their marriage went though and they are now letting us in on how our marriages can be better.

They sum up the whole book on p.92:

“Pressed to choose our “top three things that would most help your marriage,” we would come down to this list: 

  1. Find life in God.
  2. Deal with your brokenness.
  3. Learn to shut down the spiritual attacks that come against your marriage.
Practice this and nothing else, and you will be amazed at the freedom, love, and joy that will begin to flow.”
I think I have never heard wiser advice. 
Get this book. You will not be the same after reading it. 


Sad Plants

Sad Plants in July 2009

We had lots of rain in March, April, and May. Then in June we had virtually nothing. Consequently, my plants were not happy. Even the daphne was drooping badly.

So I got outside with the hose and gave them all a good dousing. They started responding in a few days.

A Loss

We grieve anytime we have a loss. I have just been reading Captivating by John and Staci Eldredge. This is the Wild at Heart book for women. They are talking in the chapter I’m reading that every woman has a beauty to unveil. And that she brings that beauty to the relationship.

While watering the plants, I was reminded about how much beauty Trudie used to bring to my life. She brought beauty through the plants she planted. She brought beauty through the decorating she did in the house. She brought beauty by bringing her own beauty to our relationship. Thinking about the beauty that is no longer here I got sad. I stayed sad for a number of days. It’s probably the closest I’ve been to actual depression.

Beauty Replaced

I took my sadness and pain to the Lord. He has taught me that He can handle anything I’m feeling. After a while, He taught me to look to Jesus to see beauty. I see beauty in His creation. I see His beauty in the variety of birds and animals. I see His beauty in the variety of plants He has put around me. I see beauty in His love for me that sustains me every day.

I’ve climbed out from my sadness. I know that I’ve lost a beauty but I am now more aware that there is so much beauty around me and that it is a gift from God.